...since I've blogged. In my mind, if I have time to blog; I have time to do other things that NEED to be done. Writing my thoughts out takes a long time (even the smallest of entries). I should count how many times I hit that BACK button.

I think one of the main reasons I stayed away; was because of one bad email experience a few months ago. ...

It seems that every time I sit down to write, there's a PILE of dishes in the sink.

Well, it's late and I need to get to bed. I just wanted to stop by. I forgot how much I like it here.

Towards the last few weeks of January, I was wondering whether or not I was going to start my period. Every day I would tell myself, "I'm going to start soon." In my mind there was no way I could have been pregnant again. We had been WAY to careful. And if I was pregnant again, God REALLY wanted me to have that baby. (What with all of the precautions J and I have been taking.) So you can imagine that after about 4 weeks of wondering, I was getting anxious. If I wasn't, good... that allows me to focus on the babies I have. We can think of having more in a year or two. We do think of stopping. And if I was, good... hold on tight, we're in for a ride. This would mean, that I would have a total of about 6 baby years back to back. I tried to prepare myself with positive thinking. "You could be pregnant, and it's ok. God will take care of you. God is good. He created coffee right!" ha.. "Having a third baby so soon will be hard, but I can do it with the support of my family and friends." I started taking my prenatal vitamins, drinking more water, and less coffee. I tried not to focus on the fact that Blake had just turned one and he would only be about 20 months by the time the next one came. What about his "baby" years. Would he be bumped up to big kid too soon? I'm still breastfeeding him off and on... guess we're going to stop. (some would say, "um, yeah some time before he turns 5 would be nice") With another baby so soon, I would worry that Blake would be the middle child who feels cheated. What about Molly? She's at a point where she needs a lot of "redirection" and attention. I can imagine being tired and sick, and trying to get Molly to obey (when she knows I'm not willing to get off the couch). Heck, J just started to get more attention from me again... poor guy. I tend to have a one track mind when I'm pregnant. I don't multitask as well, and I become very careful with my actions. Slow and steady becomes my motto... (Now that I think about it, that may be my motto for life regardless of any pregnancy...hmmm.) We hope to move some time within the year. Moving while pregnant means I'm less help, and not fond of the work it takes to put a house together. My mom would be happy. She knows a woman at her church who is my age, and just had her third. "I tell her that you seem to always be a step behind her with having babies and all", I can hear her now. So she basically wants me to keep up with the Jones'. Well, as I had counted it; I had been waiting for 42 days, and couldn't wait any longer. I took a test early Saturday morning, and the little horizontal line meant that I was not pregnant. I have to say that I was relieved and a bit sad at the same time. I had already prepared my mind to accept a new pregnancy and a new little Riley running around. I took a moment as if to say, that's too bad.              

 I am happy to not be pregnant. All of our effort did not go in vain. I feel like I have received a gift of extra time, that will be spent on Molly and Blake. (cheesy??) I still have not had my period. If you think about it, I've been pregnant since 2004. So my body is taking it's time getting back on track.

I'm sick.
But instead of being "self medicated", I'm "husband medicated". Yes, I am able to take the right medicines/vitamins I need while I'm sick. But J likes to make sure I don't forget and offers suggestions. "Did you make sure to take ___" or, "Why don't you have a little bit of ____" , "I'll make you some more tea", and "What time did you take ___". He likes to take my temperature, and feel my forehead. (I hardly ever take my own temperature.) He wants me to rest, when normally I would probably rest... less. He even took the kids fishing with him, so I could sleep (for a long time) at home!! I am so very blessed to have J home this week to take care of me. I love him....

We have spent lots of time fishing in the past few weeks.

 
I love this picture!!! He's just so happy!



They even want to fish in doors...

  

When we set up, the kids have their own poles, and J and I have two poles each. Why so many poles you ask? If you ask J, he would say something like, "why not!?" or "so we can catch more fish"... But if you ask me, it's because fishing is a lot about luck.



(side note: this is her favorite shirt right now.)

It's not in the picture, but Molly has her own full size pink and purple fishing pole.


Just after this was taken, J went to the dock to fish. Blake decided that he wanted to put the pole in the water as well as himself.(he didn't make it in, but the pole did) When I would hold him or the pole back, he would squeel like a little pig. We ended up tangled in the fishing line.





Notice: Molly and I aren't big fans of sticking our fingers in the fish's mouth... I'm pretty sure the only reason I kept that fish, is because it was the only one I caught.

 

This fish was actually record breaking!! (Just look at that smile..!)

Now, you might be wondering ... Why fishing? Maybe not.. you might love fishing too!

Sure, I love that we are together, active, outdoors, having fun, and catching fish (dinner...). But honestly,  I do it for him...
Just to see the look on J's face. He get's so excited, like a little kid. He loves to take his family fishing, and see us have a good time; doing something he loves to do himself! You can't help but smile when you catch a fish... One day I went, determined to take my dark cloud with me. But as soon as I caught that fish... I couldn't help it. I was in such a good mood after that. (and I did apologize for my sour attitude) WE HAVE BEEN HAVING SUCH A GREAT TIME!

I cant help but cut calories when a fly drowns in my coffee cup. At which point I toss my coffee down the sink.

I would say that for the past few weeks we have had at least one fly in the house at all times. Gross I know, but that's how it has been lately. I don't like flies, and I can't think of anyone who does. I keep my water glass in the refrigerator so I can use it all day, and keep the flies off of it. The other day I had to toss my coffee 'cause I couldn't stand to drink it after I caught a fly crawling around in my mug. Then on the next day, when the left over coffee had gotten cold by late afternoon; I thought that I would drink it, instead of making a new pot. I poured myself a cup, in my new "Blaker Man" mug. Cream and sugar were added and I thought I'd taste it for quality, before warming it up in the microwave. I sipped it, and sort of stir... WHAT IS THAT!!.... a DEAD fly floating in my last cup of coffee! Luckily I hadn't swallowed yet. I spit in the sink, poured out the yucky fly coffee, and washed my coffee pot. I tell you what... I keep a pot holder over my mug now. So yes... when a fly lands in my coffee and I have to throw it out (which I hate to do), I figure that means less calories for me. ...Until I eat an entire See's milk chocolate 'n' toffee bar, without sharing it.